Tuesday, 26 February 2013


It makes me sick, the way sadness is addicting. The way I can't stop. Sadness s familiar. It's comfortable and It's easy in a sense that it comes naturally to me. But every thing else is hard . The way that my body aches with self-hatred. The way my mind spins and spins with hopeless thoughts. The way it poisons everything i do , every relationship i have. yes its addicting , because i know sadness and i know it very well . and there is a sort of comfort with that being lone after every thing is ok.........

My Pointless Nonsense

 sometimes i just want to go away , you know vanish and stuff. But simply i cant . not because i 'm going to miss anything , i have nothing here. but i want to believe that somebody's gonna miss me. i have nothing to live for , i am reckless and nonsense at the most of the times .  so why care ?? it kind of makes me sick . how being alone and pointless comes so naturally , addicting. almost contagious . Being sad is easy , comfortable and every other felling is hard . Every thing that's worth something has a price on it . especially love. Every where they say that inner beauty is worth more than the out side or despite of the fact of being fat  the beauty of your face is enough . And that sentence kills me. How hey tell it to every children , give them hope of something that is never comes true . The harsh truth is , if you'r ugly nobody loves you , if you are fat everybody makes fun of you or moms point at you and say to their teenage daughter 'if you eat like this you'll become like her. ' And if you are ugly and fat there is only one path - cats - and that's it . So why to care about some people that doesn't care about you? why to simile to their lies . when its so easy to get away